How to Plan a 40th Birthday Weekend Away

A 40th birthday is a very good excuse to get all your favourite people together for a weekend.

The idea is the easy bit.

Getting 16, 20 or even 30 people to agree on a date, budget, bedrooms and who’s bringing what? That’s where it gets interesting.

At The Big House Co. we’ve been helping groups get together in big houses for over 30 years, so here are some of the things worth thinking about before you start planning your 40th birthday weekend away.

Trying to find a weekend when 20 people are all available can go on forever.

Choose two or three possible dates, give everyone a deadline to respond and go with the one that works for the majority.

And don’t get too attached to celebrating on your actual birthday. Moving your weekend by a few weeks can give you much more choice,  particularly around school holidays and popular weekends.

The slightly unhelpful answer on how far out to book is: it depends! Sometimes you’ll need to book much further ahead than you think, and sometimes you’ll be surprised by what you can find at relatively short notice.

The house, the size of your group and the time of year all make a difference. Christmas and New Year, Bank Holiday weekends and the summer holidays tend to get snapped up early, particularly if you have your heart set on a particular house. If you’re more flexible about dates or can travel outside the busiest periods, you may have much more choice closer to the time.

Our advice? If you’ve found the right house, for the right number of people, on the right weekend, book it. Getting 20 or 30 people together is complicated enough without losing the house while everyone spends another fortnight thinking about it.

You’ve got 20 guests. Brilliant. But who are they?

Ten couples is relatively straightforward. Five couples, four single friends, two teenagers and your parents is an entirely different bedroom puzzle.

Before looking for somewhere to stay, make a rough rooming list. Think about who is happy sharing, who definitely isn’t, whether children can share and whether anyone needs a ground-floor bedroom.

It will make finding the right house much easier. For extra help read ‘How many bedrooms for groups of 20, 25 and 30 people‘ blog piece.

Possibly not the most exciting part of planning a 40th, but definitely one of the most useful. The best advice is to start this part of the conversation early in the planning and agree it.

Are you paying for the accommodation? Is everyone contributing? Does the cost include food? Are people paying separately for activities or a special meal?

There isn’t a right answer, but there is a right time to talk about it – before anyone commits.

Once you know roughly what everyone is comfortable spending, you can make much more realistic decisions about the weekend.

You have finally managed to get some of your favourite people in one place. You don’t necessarily need to entertain them.

Of course, you might want to organise something special, but leave room around it. One of the loveliest things about getting a big group together for a weekend is all the stuff that isn’t planned – long breakfasts, conversations over coffee, walks, drinks in the kitchen and catching up with someone you haven’t properly spoken to for months.

Give everyone a bit of space to enjoy the house and each other.

You may be the birthday person, but you don’t have to be the project manager.

Give people jobs.Someone can organise Friday-night food. Someone else can sort the playlist. Another person can bring the birthday cake. Put someone in charge of breakfast.You can even nominate the particularly organised friend to chase everybody for money.

There is absolutely no prize for reaching Sunday exhausted because you’ve spent your own 40th birthday making sure everyone else has enough coffee.

A shared WhatsApp group can save an extraordinary amount of confusion.

Before the weekend, make sure everyone has the address, arrival time, room arrangements and knows what they need to bring.

Sort out supermarket deliveries in advance if you’re having one. Check what’s already provided at the house. Find out where you’re eating if you’re going out and book early if you’re a large group.

Make sure that everyone knows what the payment situation is too, extras such as drinks and extra snacks etc, so everyone has a clear idea of what is already covered or what might need covering.

A little organisation beforehand means much less organising once you’re there.

The best thing about a 40th birthday weekend isn’t necessarily the hot tub, the enormous dinner or whatever you’ve planned for Saturday night.

It’s having everyone there.

Life gets busy. Friends live in different places. Families don’t necessarily get together as often as they once did.

A whole weekend gives you something an evening celebration can’t: time together.

And that’s probably worth celebrating.

Once you’ve sorted your guest list, dates and budget, you can start looking for the fun bit – the house. Look for somewhere with enough bedrooms for your particular group, plenty of communal space and the facilities that matter to you.

These three are an excellent place to start. Or browse our full collection from elegant manor houses to countryside retreats with pools and hot tubs, The Big House Co. party houses offer the perfect setting.

If you’re looking to celebrate a milestone birthday in style, Tatham House is made for unforgettable group weekends. Sleeping up to 22 guests, this luxurious Somerset retreat combines elegant interiors with incredible entertainment spaces designed for bringing everyone together.

Inside, you’ll find stylish open-plan social areas, a large dining space perfect for celebratory meals, and beautifully designed en-suite bedrooms that make the whole weekend feel extra special. The house also features a cinema room, games area with pool table and table tennis, plus spacious lounges ideal for relaxing with friends and family after a day of celebrating.

Outside, Tatham House truly comes into its own. Guests can enjoy the indoor swimming pool, hot tub, all-weather tennis court, and beautiful gardens overlooking the Somerset countryside — creating the perfect setting for everything from laid-back afternoons to lively evening celebrations.

Ready to plan your getaway? Browse more of The Big House Co’s stunning properties here and let us help you design the perfect escape for your group.

For enquiries and to discuss your specific requirements, simply visit our Contact Us page, email us at party@TheBigHouseCo.com, or call +44 (0)1823 662673.

The Big House Company
Big enough for everyone. Personal enough to feel like home.